books 12 and 13

Hey all!  After a few days off from reading (for pleasure at least – it seems I read quite a bit for work) I gobbled up a couple of books over the past few days.  First up was Meridon, the final book in the Wideacre trilogy by Philippa Gregory.  You may remember that the first book received a rating of “meh” and the second was much better.  Boy, am I glad I didn’t give up after the first one – Meridon was excellent and now I can recommend the series fully.  (To be fair, I think Wideacre was her very first published novel, and she’s a gazillionaire today.)  Last night and this afternoon I read Reproduction Is The Flaw Of Love by Lauren Grodstein.  Earlier this year I read another book by the same author.  This book was good and very real.  It also cemented my opinion that most couples should not live together before marriage.

We’ll thankfully be getting a new clothes dryer soon – ours has been out of commission for months now and the lint, THE LINT is out of control around here.  The tax refund has been deposited and will help out with that purchase.  However, I believe I’ve become addicted to having my bedsheets dried outside.  That smell is worth the work.  (And to be fair, Timon does most of the clothesline hanging all by himself.  Love that man.)

book 11

I’ve been looking on different book list recommendations for new finds I can get at our library.  Don’t by any means think that I’ve actually PURCHASED all these books I’m reading.  Only one of the eleven do I own, and that was on the $4 table at Borders.  Our library system is phenomenal and they have just about anything a voracious reader could want or need.  ANYHOO… One book recommended by Amazon.com was The Wife’s Tale by Lori Lansens.  This was an excellent book!  It’s the story of a woman waiting at home for her husband to arrive after work on the eve of their 25th wedding anniversary.  Needless to say, he doesn’t get there, and the novel explores the wife’s actions afterwards.  It was a fast and interesting read.  I’ve got two more of her novels to tackle soon.

I won’t have much reading time for the next several days.  Timon and I (and two other adults) are taking the youth group on a retreat about 2 hours away this weekend.  We leave tomorrow at 5:30pm.  The kids are staying the weekend with their surrogate grandparents and couldn’t care less where we are or when we’ll be back.  We are so blessed to have these lovely people in our lives.

Henry did something last night that just threw me.  We were reading an assigned book for school about Electricity, and in a photograph there was a boy who obviously (to me, anyway) had Down Syndrome using a light switch.  Henry paused in his reading, looked at the boy closer and then said, “Uh, Mom?”  pause pause pause (meanwhile I’m thinking he is going to ask why that boy looks different or strange to him, and preparing to explain Down Syndrome to him) “That boy has reddish hair, just like mine!”  *sigh*  Of course he only sees what’s the same about that boy.  Once again, the kid teaches the parent something.

books 7-10

Hey all.  It’s been a while since I’ve had a chance to update my books, but rest assured, I have several to tell you about now.  But I think I’ll save you the time and quickly tell you if you should bother reading these or not.

7. Wideacre, by Philippa Gregory.  Meh.  Not as good as her other books.  Plus it’s got kind of a smutty element, more so than her other books.  However, you might want to read it in order to better understand book 10 below.

8. A Reliable Wife, by Robert Goolrick.  Awesome.  Dark and intense.  Read it.

9. The Help, by Kathryn Stockett.  Very, very good.  Read it.

10. The Favored Child, by Philippa Gregory.  This is book 2 in the Wideacre trilogy, and it’s much better than the first book.  I really liked this and finished it this afternoon. 

It’s Saturday night and Maria just went to bed.  Henry’s reading on our bed, with no tv for the night because he had a hard time listening this afternoon.  My man is (NO LIE) watching Lawrence Welk and I’m wishing I could eat what we had for dinner every night.  [Chicken coated in french-fried onions, roasted carrots, wild rice]  I had rehearsal this morning, and then played with the kids and read and napped with Timon.  We are expert nappers.  Church tomorrow, then more relaxing.  Next weekend Timon and I head out with the youth group on a retreat and the kids will spend the weekend with their surrogate grandparents.  For now I’m just soaking up and relishing this time with the kids and with Timon.

xviii

Hello Maresi,

So today is your thirty-#$%rd birthday. I wanted to take this opportunity to tell you how special you are to me and how much joy you bring to my life. Words cannot fully express the happiness I feel when I think about our marriage and the family we have. But I want you to know, you are my one true love and I will love you forever.

I will never forgot when I saw you for the first time as you were loading the back of your friend Katie’s green VW. I am glad you keep finding reasons to "do rounds" through the dorm hall I was staying in during my lunch hour thus allowing me to offer you a sandwich and eventually ask you on a date.

I can hardly believe that summer was 12 ½ years ago. I cannot get over all the joy, happiness, tears, and laughs we have experienced and shared together. And thru it all my love for you continues to grow and increase exponentially. Every day I think I could not possibly love you anymore than I already do, but I always seem to fall in love with you a little more each and every day. Every day you never cease to amaze me, bring a smile to my face, or warm my heart. There is something in the way you laugh, smile at me, or act silly with our children that causes an indescribable sense of joy in my heart. I could not think of a more caring, loving, beautiful, compassionate, and wonderful woman to spend my life with.

You are so important to me and I owe so much of who I am to you being in my life. Thank you for loving me and being a part of my life.

Love,

Timon

xxiv

I love my husband so much.  Do you know that we have been together for over 12 1/2 years now?  Married for 9+ years and two kids later, and he’s still not sick of me.  Even when each of us is acting like a total asshat, even when we’re exhausted and the kids are making us want to run away, we have chosen to stick it out.  Reading TIME magazine’s cover story about marriage got me thinking that if people spent at least the same amount of time planning and preparing for their marriage as they do planning and preparing for their wedding day, many more couples would stay wed.  Marriage is how we learn about selfless love, about how Christ loves us, and about how we are to sacrifice for another to whom we are devoted.  There have been many, many times where I fail to learn these lessons.  Timon has failed sometimes, too.  But when we get it right, when we are quick to apologize with humility, when we swallow our pride and put the other one first, when we are affectionate and demonstrative with our feelings… it’s overwhelmingly awesome.  And I’m writing this down during this season of Thanksgiving so that in the inevitable cold, dark and distant times, I’ll have it to look at to remember what on earth we’re hanging in there for.  Second only to my love for God, Timon is the love of my life.

Summer 2010 Trip #3

Yes, we’ve been on three trips this summer.  My sister-in-law got married in June in Alabama, my cousin got married in July in Connecticut, and last week we went to south Georgia for a meet-up with Timon’s parents. 

We went to a state park that’s just barely over the state line that was on a lake.  The cottages there are great – AC, full kitchen, two bedrooms and two bathrooms.  Also: satellite tv, which we barely used but was handy in checking baseball scores each evening and on one rainy afternoon Henry got to watch All Dogs Go To Heaven. 

 
The kids were fantastic in the car on the way up.  We’ve been blessed with good car travelers.  And now that I’ve typed those words, we will PAY DEARLY on our next road-trip.  We cooked a lot of good food while we were there, which, when you have absolutely nothing else to do other than read a book or go swimming with your kids, isn’t the chore it seems to be at home.  And THE BEST PART OF IT ALL was that there was a (cue angels singing) DISHWASHER!!!  Perhaps you’ve always had a dishwasher and this means very little to you.  But I’ve lived without a dishwasher in my home since I moved out of my first apartment in 2001.  And seeing as how the cottage was on a lake, with a screened-in porch, and was bigger than my own home, the dishwasher pretty much put it over the top to where I very nearly refused to leave. 

Maria enjoyed cutting wooden fruit and helping Mimi in the kitchen, first supervising the shrimp deveining, and then snapping beans in half.

 
 

Henry loved fishing with his daddy, taking solemn self portraits, and snuggling with Maggie the dog.  [He really, really wants us to get a dog.] 

 

   
I’m ready to go back.  Who wants to join me?

meh, I’m not really into this movie.

Timon just put on Green Zone, with Matt Damon.  Now, I LOVE Matt Damon, but it’s all a little shooty and yelly for me.  So, I figure I’ll do a little post.  Look at me, acting like I actually still blog anymore.  (Well, to be fair, I have faithfully updated the photo blog every day this year, and that takes a lot out of me.)

Timon: He has just gotten a new show in the theatre.  He is (thankfully) still bearded and just today did an awesome job mopping all the floors in the house.  When the kids and I were in Connecticut last weekend, he mailed us a card that said he missed us.  Now, come on.  That’s pretty fantastic!  We just celebrated 9 years of marriage on the 7th.

Me:  I survived traveling with both children once more on the airplane to Connecticut.  They were far better behaved than the couple who got on last and were forced to sit apart (open seating).  I wanted to shove a bag of peanuts down his throat, and then tape the airsick bag over her mouth, but I couldn’t use my left arm since she dropped what felt like a sack of 25 rolls of quarters on me as she was stowing her junk in the overhead bin.  This was after we departed an hour late.  Anyhoo, my life is essentially the same as usual.

Henry:  This kid can read all day long, particularly if you stick a Garfield comic book in his hand.  Quotation of the week: “Talking cats are funny!”  He had the best time of his life on vacation with his cousins.  It was so awesome to see him enjoying their rowdy company.  He loves summer vacation.  He kept me company in the lazy river at our local waterpark last week.  He likes waterslides and pancakes.  Another quotation for you: “In this circumstance, I would like some milk.”

Maria:  She has 3 new obsessions: Her cousin Julia, her cousin Emmett, and nail files.  She talks a LOT, and is very silly.  She helped me tell Henry to go to his room yesterday.  She answers her own question of where Julia is by saying “House.  Mama.”, meaning Julia is at her house with her Mama.  Any baby is Emmett now.  She likes to put her hands in shallow water and let her legs float up behind her.  Pirate’s Booty is her favorite food, with grapes as a close second.

(at my Gram’s house, in her yard on the sledding/rolling hill)

catching up

• 
  
  This morning, Timon brought me towels warm from the dryer for me to use after my shower.  I think I would like this to happen every day of my life.  It was truly luxurious.  I imagine that it’s how people who buy things from the Sky Mall catalog must live.
  
  
• 
  
  Speaking of Sky Mall, my sister and cousin and their sweet babies are coming to visit us next Monday!  I’m so, so happy about this.  The thought of their arrival is almost all that is sustaining me through this week.  That, and warm towels. 
  
  
• 
  
  I realize I didn’t make a clear connection between Sky Mall and my sister and cousin coming to visit just now.  Allow me to explain - You see, usually whenever one of us travels to see the others, we peruse the Sky Mall catalog on the plane, and fold down the corners of pages featuring items we think the others will particularly enjoy.  And by “enjoy”, I mean “find totally ridiculous.”  That little publication never lets us down.  What, you don’t do this when you’re traveling?  Boy, are you missing out.
  
  
• 
  
  The Olympics are KILLING.ME.SOFTLY.WITH.THE.TIRED.  All you people with DVR don’t know how lucky you have it.  I either must stay up thanks to Bob Costas and his teasing me with the major events kept to the very END OF THE BROADCAST, that’s midnight, people; or miss the action entirely and catch up on results the next day via the internets.  Internets aren’t as fun when it comes to the Olympics.  Bob Costas, you are a mean, mean man, with your inexplicably dark hair that used to be blond.  Am I right, dear readers reader?  Am I RIGHT?!
  
  
• 
  
  Speaking of raven-haired Bob, we turned on the tv at 8pm, like faithful little lemmings following Bob to the edge of the CLIFF OF MIDNIGHT (v. v. tired) and saw this:
  
  
  
  I have no words.  Except to say I could use fewer features about polar bears and instead, could you please move the pairs figure skating finals up about an hour, Bob Costas?

today’s message:

(Timon and I have been married eight years today.)

my beloved

hope you've got 4 minutes and 31 seconds... I promise it won't be time wasted.

finally catching up to me

My wonderful husband is thirty years old today. And I am missing all my chances to remind him of how old he is now, because he and Henry are still there and I am here. Although, last year while we were up there, I made sure they put "Happy 30th Birthday" on his cake. That felt good.

Timon really is a catch. My friend Andrea pointed that fact out to me about 9 years ago, and I'm glad I listened. She is smart (and classically trained!). I could go on and on listing the reasons why he's a great guy, but I'll pick just a few to share today...

1. He is a great, great dad. He makes so many things possible for me to do independently with my work and travel because he almost ALWAYS is able and willing to take care of Henry on his own. He didn't think twice about how he'd handle things when I went trotting off to Greece for a week, or when my family needs me, or when I have a week-long mission trip with the kids, etc. When Henry was 3 months old Timon brought him to Alabama to show him off to friends and family by himself. It was hard to share the holding of our son because Timon wanted him near all the time. It's nearly always been like this (Henry's not even 2 days old here):

I can only imagine how Bertha will get Timon wrapped around her little finger within seconds of her arrival in September. While I am uncomfortable at this state of pregnancy, Timon is always there with a statement like "I can't wait to meet our new baby!"

2. That brings me to my next point - the day before they left on vacation just now, Timon had me sit on the exercise ball in front of him and gave me a spectacular back rub, one that he hoped would last me through the week-long absence. He's done more than his share around the house to make up for my decreasing physical abilities (I'm going to need arm extensions soon if I plan on washing any more dishes) even while working full time in an un-air-conditioned work shop and doing the bulk of transporting Henry to and from preschool.

3. Here's a recent exchange that took place at 8:45 pm:
Me (standing in front of open cupboards): Hey, would it be weird if I made a pan of cornbread right now?
Him: No, I guess not.
That right there is love, people. No criticism for a crazy pregnant lady wanting cornbread late at night.

4. I gave Timon a hard time while he was packing, making sure all his needed items were included - and then I forgot to pack any pajamas at all for Henry. All he did was chuckle at me over the phone and reassure me that he'd make it work. Would I be as kind if he did something similar? I can't promise that I would have been.

And one more reason: This is his professional staff photo (I've shared it before in a different kind of post) hung in the lobby of the theatre he works for:

He rarely fails to make me laugh.

I love you, Timon. I am so glad you came rushing into this world, about 6 weeks early, in your parents' bed in the middle of the night. The world is blessed that your parents knew a midwife close by and that prayers and advances in medical science kept you healthy until you could leave the hospital. I hope we have at least the next 60 years to spend together, laughing at our children and delighting in God's promises, side by side. Happy birthday.

copper/wool

Neither Timon nor I bought each other anything fashioned from copper or wool today; these are the traditional gifts given on the seventh wedding anniversary, which we celebrate today. We actually decided to forgo gifts to each other this year (babies is 'spensive, for realz) but Timon showed up to surprise me at work today with a lovely bouquet of flowers in one of my favorite vases (a wedding gift, naturally) and a sweet card. Then he went home and brought back some leftover pizza for lunch, since I couldn't leave the office for one cotton-pickin' second today. (Yes, our church secretary is still on vacation; and yes, many of our lightning strike related problems are unresolved.) What a husband!
I posted this last year, but it's all I've got access to right now. It's a good one, so let's look at it again, shall we?

Fourth of July fireworks photos, etc. will be posted tomorrow.

talking (okay, typing) it out

I am so terribly sorry for what you're about to read. I truly, truly wish that I had other things to be thinking and posting about. If you're tired of the sob story already, I'll understand if you close the page right now.

If you've stuck around then here goes: If possible, the pain is worse. Driving has become agony. I was in tears all the way to and from the OB's office today. I spent nearly my entire visit in tears. Just when I'd finally gotten myself together and was on my way out of the office, I ran into the sweet nurse who has been kind enough to listen to me when I request that my blood be drawn from my left hand only since any other spot leaves terrible bruising. She is also the one who returns the non-urgent calls to patients like me. She asked if I was okay and I lost it again.

I left the doctor with a confirmation of my SPD self-diagnosis. She gave me a prescription for Vicodin which is totally terrifying to me, despite her reassurances that it's safe. I also don't have a good track record with taking narcotics - Oxycodone left me completely NUTS, made me nauseated, and gave me 2 nights of insomnia. If that doesn't give me some good relief, we will probably explore some physical therapy.

I'm much more concerned with how this will affect the delivery of the baby - I will likely have limited birthing positions available vaginally, and although I was planning on avoiding it, an epidural might mask the pain to where I don't notice if I'm being positioned in a way that could cause serious damage to my pelvis. However, I REALLY REALLY REALLY DO NOT WANT A C-SECTION. (Please, I KNOW that women have them everyday and are FINE. I don't need to be reminded.) This is all stuff I'll have to work through emotionally as the next weeks go by. If you pray, and I hope you do, prayers for physical and emotional healing are really needed right now.

I want to end this by saying that my husband has been so amazing. He has washed every dish, done all of Henry's transportation, gotten up repeatedly to help me get up off the couch (just because I'm in pain doesn't mean my frequent bathroom trips are in any way reduced), rubbed my feet, held me while I cried, encouraged me to seek more medical attention than I would have on my own, and just generally been awesome, all while working full-time. I am not fun to live with right now, and I'm so blessed to have a man who has risen to his promise to me before God and our family and friends of "in sickness and in health."

okay, back to you

After yesterday's post, I got some very kind and encouraging comments. Thanks, ladies. I'm hoping things will change once my pelvic belt arrives from Mars Freaking New Zealand. It remains to be seen if Flight of the Conchords aren't the only awesome import from that lovely, but terribly, ridiculously far away country.

In the spirit of folks leaving kind comments, here are two places you should check out that aren't in my blogroll over to the right. One belongs to a lovely woman named Emilie who has two gorgeous young sons, is an excellent writer, and happens to be struggling right now with invasive, fast growing cancer. I can't even remember how exactly I found this blog, but I know that Emilie is an amazing person.

The other blog you should spend some time with is that of Matt, Liz, & Madeline. Matt & Liz were overjoyed at the birth of their first daughter several weeks premature after 5 weeks of bed rest for Liz. While she was getting ready to leave her hospital room the next day to hold her daughter for the first time, Liz went unconscious and passed away suddenly from an embolism. Matt has done a phenomenal job paying tribute to his lovely wife and documenting his process learning fatherhood on his own. It's not an easy blog to read, given how tragic the circumstances surrounding its development - but I promise you'll come away with compassion and awe of this man's love for his wife and daughter; AND of the many, many strangers who've sent Matt & Madeline gifts and notes, which he lovingly posts photos of as he receives them. And if something good can come out of something so horrific, then I can be sure God's still working in the world.

Not that I can have much doubt - last night I was in tears because of this pain, and Timon began rubbing my feet, and Henry snuggled up to me and told me it was okay. *sigh*

kiss day #10 (now with photo)

Today, Timon and I have been together for 10 years. We first kissed on May 18, 1998, and other than our time living in different states, we haven't been apart since. We met on May 11, 1998 at my college when he arrived to slave away for next to nothing do an internship in the summer theatre program, and I was in charge of the dorms for the interns. I made up plenty of reasons to visit the dorm, just to spend a few minutes with him. There is still some confusion over just who asked whom out on our first date (to see The Horse Whisperer), but regardless, we obviously hit it off - and haven't looked back. He is a hard worker, an awesome dad, a fantastic friend, and he's also quite the looker. I'm SO looking forward to the next 60 or so May 18ths with my wonderful husband.

Here we are in June-ish of 1998.

(please ignore just how skinny I was back then. it's very depressing.)

decision '08 (overheard at a debate)

"I'm pretty sure your screw-up was worse."

"Um, no. Messing up a fish dinner for which you had no recipe and were experimenting is NOT worse than misreading 1/2 cup shortening for 2 cups shortening in my dad's tried-and-true recipe and wrecking the banana bread."

"But then we had no meal, we had to scrounge around!"

"I had to clean the oven TWICE after the shortening bath it took with your disgusting mess. And besides, me making a gross fish meal without a recipe... well, let's just say I could be compared to the Wright Brothers. I was trying to be an innovator. You, on the other hand, are like Boeing, screwing up one of the same engines you've been making for 30 years."

"I still disagree, but I have to admit that I cannot dispute your logic."

*****************************************
Who do you think won this round? Or let me put it this way: Which would you be more likely to turn down - a fish dinner, or fresh baked banana bread? Which loss is greater? Weigh in in the comments, please.

handy

I've got some work that needs doing around the house. Which of these workers would you hire?

I just can't pick.

19 until 30

Some highlights from today:

*I had great french toast today. I fixed it for breakfast and it never fails to delight me. It was made even better because my fantastic husband whipped out a nice new griddle pan that he bought at a yard sale for $2. It was the missing link between okay french toast and excellent french toast. He bought it for my birthday but couldn't wait to give it to me. That makes 3 things he has bought for my birthday that I've received already. If you know my husband at all, you know that this is exceptionally strange and seriously out of character for him. I'm not questioning anything.

*Henry and I played school today. He made sure to tell Timon that "I was gonna be the student, and my Mommy was the teacher." He and Friend and Curious George formed a class at the table and we did some pages from three workbooks, made 2 crafts, played that really fun game called "sort the bills into piles for filing", had recess, and then lunch. He was so funny. I think we'll make it a regular Friday event.

*I'm brining a chicken right now! We're having friends over for dinner tomorrow, and I thought I'd give it a shot. I put lots of salt, lemon pepper seasoning, parsley and bay leaves in water and boiled it, cooled it down, and put a roaster chicken in. It's in the fridge until 2 tomorrow when it'll go in the oven. I'll let you know how it goes.

*Tonight was our first outdoor movie night of the season at church. We showed Evan Almighty, which is really funny and cute for families. Henry had a blast until he got kicked in the face (by accident by one of the youth) and then he claimed his popcorn made him sick (it got stuck in his throat and he coughed a couple of times). Poor kid.

*My parents are gonna love this one: Henry just now came out of his room to tell us he couldn't sleep. I told him "You can't sleep if you're not in your bed." I am turning into my mom! (Not that that's a bad thing.)

21 until 30

Here's a chance for you to get to know this handsome fella a little better... Isn't that special?!? He asked me to marry him 8 years ago last week.


The words of Timon are in orange.
1. The phone rings. Who are you hoping it is?
Before lunch, I'd like it to be my wife either bringing me lunch, wanting to meet me for lunch, or asking me to come home for lunch. Otherwise, Alex.
2. When shopping at the grocery store, do you return your cart?
Yes, if it's not raining.
3. In a social setting, are you more of a talker or a listener?
I try to ask questions.
4. If abandoned alone in the wilderness, would you survive?
I would try.
5. Do you like to ride horses?
I wish I could ride a horse to work everyday, or that I worked on horseback.
6. Did you ever go to camp as a kid?
You bet. Some of my fondest childhood memories come from camp. Peace Camp 1992!
7. What was your favorite board game as a kid?
Checkers, but I always lost to my dad. I'm scarred for life.
8. If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/she was taken what would you do?
Like as a stalker? Nevermind the fact that I'm taken!
9. Are you judgmental?
Yes.
10. Would you date someone with different religious beliefs?
Like the stalker in question number 8?
11. Are you continuing your education?
Not as much as I'd like to and know I should.
12. Do you know how to shoot a gun?
Yes.
13. If your house was on fire, what's the first thing you'd grab?
Henry
14. How often do you read books?
Once a year whether I need to or not.
15. Do you think more about the past, present or future?
I don't think.
16. What is your favorite children's book?
Mike Mulligan and his Steam Shovel
17. How tall are you?
6'3" if I don't slouch
18. Where is your ideal house located?
in the shade
19. Last person you talked to?
Maresi
20. When was the last time you were at Olive Garden?
I'm using their wifi right now! But seriously, folks...2001.
21. What are your keys on your key chain for?
My personal key chain has my house and car keys, my work key chain has keys to about 27 different doors and locks, and the work vans and truck.
22. What did you do last night?
took Henry for a walk around the neighborhood, watched Dancing With The Stars, fell asleep
23. Where is your current pain at?
I have a stich in my side from riding the bike too soon after dinner (flashbacks of 5th Grade gym class with Mrs. Dixon running the mile too soon after breakfast)
24. Do you like mustard?
most definitely, extra spicy, please
25. Do you like your mom or dad?
both
26. How long does it take you in the shower?
ten minutes.
27. What movie do you want to see right now?
Eastern Promises
28. What did you do for New Year's?
watched Garrison Keillor on PBS all by myself
30. Do you own a camera phone?
no, my wife does
31. What's the last letter of your middle name?
L
32. Who did you vote for on American Idol?
Reuben Studdard, my homie from high school