Showing posts with label those who've gone on before. Show all posts
Showing posts with label those who've gone on before. Show all posts

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

we laughed, we cried, etc.

In case you need a good cry, listen/watch this song by Steven Curtis Chapman.  His daughter was killed in an accident last year.  Her name was Maria.  This song pierces me and scares me and gives me hope and it's gorgeous. 



Now, if laughs are all you're after, check this one out.  This video reveals aspects of my children's personalities that are very interesting. 

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

eleventh

Last night my family was given a gift. It's hard to put it into words, but I'll try.

If you've been reading this blog for a while, you probably know that my cousin Greg died in 2006. This wasn't a guy with nothing going for him. He had plans - big ones. One of them was to do a thru-hike of the Appalachian Trail, all 2,175 miles of it, with his friend, Aggie (seen here holding Greg's photo). Last night I got to see a show on the National Geographic Channel on the AT, and at the end, the summit, was Aggie, known by her trail name Moon Shadow (given to her by Greg as they planned and dreamed about the journey). She carried some of Greg's ashes on her trip, sprinkling them along the trail as she walked.

I knew she might be on the show, but it was getting late and at 8:55 I had just about given up. But then I gasped, "That's Aggie!" and burst into tears - because she looked so healthy and happy and fulfilled. Because Greg should have been there with her. Because he WAS there with her. Because they made it, the whole way.

Thursday, April 09, 2009

Hate. Love.

Hate is a pretty strong word that names a very strong emotion. I catch myself using it carelessly - saying "Ooooh, I hate that!" when I'm talking about something minor and dumb. I have been thinking over the past month or so that I need to reserve it for the serious stuff - hopefully there aren't many occasions that truly warrant it. Today, sadly is one of them.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:
2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

I hate that April 9th means anything more than it's the day after April 8th and the day before April 10th. I hate the powers and evils of drug addiction. I hate heroin. I hate how my cousin's life was cut short. I hate that his sister doesn't have a living brother. I hate that his parents lost their son. I hate that we didn't have more time. I hate that I wasn't a very good cousin and let distance and whatever else keep me out of contact. I hate that we're now 13 instead of 14 cousins. I hate that I have to clarify with Henry that I'm talking about his friend Gregory or my cousin Gregory in heaven. I hate that Amy and her parents or any of us that love Greg have to even think about, let alone LIVE, a lifetime without him.

The only thing to overcome hate is love. Love your family, friends, neighbors, enemies, and the strangers you meet, please. Do it today, and for the rest of your days- for only God knows how many they will number.

"More Love" - Dixie Chicks
I'm so close to you baby
But I'm so far away
There's a silence between us
And there's so much to say
You're my strength, you're my weakness
You're my faith, you're my doubt
We gotta meet in the middle
To work this thing out

More love, I can hear our hearts cryin'
More love, I know that's all we need
More love, to flow in between us
To take us and hold us and lift us above
If there's ever an answer
It's more love

We're afraid to be idle
So we fill up the days
We run on the treadmill
Keep slavin' away 'til there's no time for talkin'
About trouble in mind
And the doors are all closed
Between your heart and mine

More love, I can hear our hearts cryin'
More love, I know that's all we need
More love, to flow in between us
To take us and hold us and lift us above
If there's ever an answer
It's more love

Just look out around us
People fightin' their wars
They think they'll be happy
When they've settled their scores
Let's lay down our weapons
That hold us apart
Be still for just a minute
Try to open our hearts

More love, I can hear our hearts cryin'
More love, I know that's all we need
More love, to flow in between us
To take us and hold us and lift us above
If there's ever an answer
It's more love



Tuesday, January 06, 2009

dragging.

Well, Nanny passed away on Friday afternoon. She was 90 years old, and pretty ill, not to mention her Alzheimers. We all got on a plane v. early Saturday morning, expecting to land in Birmingham at 8:05 am (central). Instead we landed in Jackson, MS, at 8:35 and sat there for a few hours while we waited for the fog to lift in B'ham. They let us off the plane and most of the people hopped on a flight to Houston which is where our flight was headed after it stopped in B'ham. Henry got to walk around and we picked up a cheeseburger, and then the pilot got word that the weather had cleared. We finally arrived in Alabama at 12:00, then took the 2 hour drive to Timon's grandmother's town. The kids were better than anyone could reasonably expect, and we did enjoy some good time with Timon's cousins and aunt. Our flight was delayed over an hour last night coming home, and we made it to our house around midnight. Henry insisted he was NOT TIRED on the way home from the airport. Maria insisted on sleeping, just like a good little girl.

Tonight will be another long night - Timon gave me tickets to this for Christmas, and so the kids will spend the night with their surrogate grandparents. Go Huskies!

Sunday, June 29, 2008

2/3rds

Yes, I'm solidly into the third trimester! Again, the passage of time seems so warped and has been since January when we found out about Bertha (formerly Sea Monkey). It's beginning to feel real (as if the soccer ball I seem to have under my skin and "muscle" layers wasn't enough to convince me) now that we're nearing July and week 29-ish. Preparations are beginning, lists are being made, purchases are being considered. We think we know what we need/want to have handy to get ready for Bertha's arrival. In fact, I couldn't resist these two little items the other day:


That should be enough for a couple of hours, don't you agree? At the OB appt. where her gender was discovered, we also found that the placenta has migrated to a more agreeable position for delivery, and that she was measuring perfect at about 2.5 pounds. My blood pressure is still great, I have gained 5 pounds total from my pre-pregnancy weight, and I haven't heard anything about my gestational diabetes test, which I assume means I didn't do myself or the baby any harm with that Dr. Pepper I had the other day, or the ice cream I had last night, or the constant consumption of fruit I've been inhaling. But that's all-natural, right?

Yesterday we took Henry to see WALL-E. It was so, so good. Henry was really into it, and laughed out loud and pumped his fist in the air after a particularly dramatic moment met it's victorious conclusion. It was great for kids and (as usual for Pixar movies) enjoyable for the grown-ups, too. Plenty of fun little details are included, too - Keep your eyes peeled for the Big-Mouth Billy Bass, all you fellow Millenials.

I saw Ashley's grandma at church today - she seems to be doing well. She told me that Ashley's mom, older sister, nieces and nephew all went to Disney today using tickets given to Ashley earlier this year when it was still a possibility that she would recover. I think that's a perfect way to begin some healing - Ash would totally give her blessing to that. We also talked about something that weighs heavily on me and has for some time - the week before the brain cancer was found in 2005, Ashley was on a mission trip with me and 3 other youth in Georgia. She complained of headaches the entire time. Of course I felt bad that her head was hurting, but I really didn't take it very seriously. Not that anyone would or could have guessed that her headaches meant she had tumors, but still - it's strange to think that through that fun long weekend, cancer was lurking, just getting ready to show itself. I'm glad to have spent that time with her and to be able to have great memories.

Oh, and yeah, it doesn't compare to your church being destroyed by flood, but the church got struck by lightning last week (again - yes, for the second time in 3 years; not even God's people are exempt from His natural displays) and here are the functions and systems affected:
-the doorbell/intercom is fried
-2 out of 3 phone lines were disrupted but have been fixed
-several thermostats and one A/C relay were blown, but have been fixed
-6 out of 8 computers have no internet access, even after the replacement of our network switch
-the computer network does not function properly - most computers have no printer access
-the fire alarm is not functioning
-the organ is totally gone, possibly unreparably fried - we didn't discover that one till this morning when the organist came into practice before the service.
Awesome, huh? And guess who gets to attempt to handle juggling all of these items getting repaired in the next two weeks while our church secretary is on vacation? If you guessed me, you'd be right. FUN. And I get to do it all while hoisting this belly around:

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

ashley

This is Ashley, my 15-year old youth who, after a nearly three year battle with cancer, yesterday afternoon entered heaven, where "He will wipe every tear from her eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. And He who was seated on the throne said, 'Look! I am making all things new!'" -Revelation 21: 3-4



But here on this mountain, God-of-the-Angel-Armies
will throw a feast for all the people of the world...
And here on this mountain, God will banish
the pall of doom hanging over all peoples,
The shadow of doom darkening all nations.
Yes, he'll banish death forever. - Isaiah 25: 6-7


Wednesday, April 09, 2008

2 years

We miss you, Greg. He loved life, and he gleaned everything he could from every adventure he took. No passage of time can diminish the pain of his death, felt most acutely by his parents and sister today - please pray for them, and hug those you love.




(These photos were taken in 2001, at and around my wedding.)

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

29 until 30

Timon and I FINALLY got to see Into The Wild on Sunday. It took forever to get here. Timon was more concerned that the details of the book be exact - and for the most part, they were. I'm one of those weirdos who loves both the books and the movies based on them - I just treat them as separate entities. It doesn't bother me that certain stories are omitted and others embellished to make a movie better. I have to say that Into The Wild lived up to every expectation I had and more. I expected to be amazed at the gorgeous locations they filmed it in, and I was. I expected to be charmed by Chris McCandless (as portrayed by Emile Hirsch), and I was. I expected to be saddened by his unfortunate demise, and I was. And I anticipated being reminded of my cousin Greg, and I surely was. I imagine Greg and Chris are on some kind of adventure together as I type.

Here is a photo from my sister-in-law of the tree Timon gave me as a wedding present. It's planted in my parents' yard - it has tripled in size, at least, from the day before the wedding when we planted it. Neither Timon nor I have tripled in size, thank heavens.



Tuesday, September 11, 2007

lest we forget


It's a week of remembrance - both today, September 11 - for the obvious reasons; and Thursday, the 13th, when our phenomenal friend Tosca went on to her reward. You can see Tosca here and read about her here.

These photos my cousin took a year ago are worth another look. http://www.kodakgallery.com/I.jsp?c=640a3ik9.bl2ivycl&x=0&y=-mlgk0f

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

clearance rack

Just having some close-out sales on tidbits of info floating around in my brain... in the hopes I might have some more room to spare for truly important things. For the low, low price of a few minutes spent reading these things, you can have your very own piece of my thoughts. You're welcome!

1. Henry and I get to go visit my sister and brother-in-law and cat-in-law tomorrow! Yippee! Henry is excited to go on an airplane, but he might be even more excited to play on the airplane playground they have at our airport. I always pray that we land at a gate out-of-sight of that area when we return home, otherwise there is a temper-fit deluxe when he realizes it's not time to play, it's time to go and get our luggage. But while we're waiting here for takeoff, it's been a lifesaver, more than once.

2. Also pray that we have a potty-accident-free day while traveling! Henry has been quite reliable lately about telling us he has to go, but occasionally (like when he's busy playing) he'll forget. I am so proud of him though - he's young to be potty trained, and boys usually train later than girls. We saw a nearly 5 year-old girl the other night who did not appear to have any other type of delays that might prevent potty training (autism, emotional or speech delays) who was in what looked like ADULT diapers (they don't make 'em for 5 year-olds!). I don't want to judge a situation that might have a legitamite explanation, so I'll leave this thought here.

3. Speaking of autism - remember that little girl who was biting Henry at preschool? Turns out she was diagnosed as autistic and is receiving two types of therapy at preschool during the week. I'm so sad that this diagnosis will be affecting her life, but pleased that she has the early intervention she needs. My oldest friend (well, the girl I've been friends with the longest... the award for oldest friend has to go to Stanny-poo, who, as we pointed out last weekend, could actually be my DAD) works with autistic children and has some sad/hilarious tales to tell about her kids. If you didn't laugh, you'd cry all day.


4. Most importantly, could you of the praying kind please shoot a few up for Amanda, a 13 year-old girl who one of the members of my youth group used to date? She passed away this morning from accidental drowning in her bathtub. I can't imagine her parents' horrific grief at this moment. Pray for peace, comfort, and understanding.


So long, for now. The next photos of me that will appear on this blog will be those taken whilst the BIG CHOP is happening. Time for a new look, kids! And, coming soon... a new blog design! I can't promise when it will occur, or what form/colors it will take... but I'm working on it. It's gonna look a lot fancier than these here dots.

I covet your comments. Thanks to those of you who take your time to leave them!

Monday, April 16, 2007

old and new

Timon's parents visited us this weekend - a lovely time. They are just finishing the long and sometimes sad process of cleaning out the condo of Timon's grandfather nearly a year after his passing. We were blessed with some nice things - most notably Maxwell's car and his set of china. He and his wife (who I never met) used this beautiful pattern as their everyday plates! They also had just about all the serving pieces you could want, down to the egg cups. We haven't decided how we'll use it yet... I'm not nearly as fastidiously careful as Maxwell and Gamma were with their dishes, and so I'm afraid I'll be clumsy with them. But we'll see. Here's the pattern:


That's pretty much the worst picture ever. But that's all Google image search came up with, unfortunately. And since I had to part ways with the fabulous camera I'd been temporarily using, that's the best I can do for now. Rest assured, the pattern is much better looking than the photo suggests. The plates aren't pink at all. It's way better looking than the silly Ames plates I've had since my first apartment seven years ago. Some of you might remember the loveliness that was Ames. Such a clean store, with such high quality merchandise.

Anyhoo, that's it for today. OH!! OH!! I haven't written about Planet Earth in a couple of weeks - the series continues to amaze and captivate my attention. Last night was "Jungles" and "Rivers". The last two episodes are on next week, "Forests" and "Caves". Catch it on the Discovery Channel Sundays at 8.

And one more thing... Leah, the daughter of Rachel Coleman, creator of Signing Time, won her school spelling bee last week! To help you understand what a big deal that is, I hope you'll go to Rachel's blog and read her post and watch the video. I was in tears - that girl is phenomenal.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

more to the story

To my family: I really need to write about this. I apologize if it's sharing too much - if you are uncomfortable, I understand. But I've come to some realizations that are powerful for me, and I'd like to voice them here. We all loved Greg, and most of his life was BEAUTIFUL, but we can't escape some of the ugliness. And I think if even one person's eyes can be opened in understanding, his life means even more than it already does.

Some of you might know that my cousin Greg died one year ago yesterday. You may not know that his was a tragic death - his life was stolen from him and the rest of us by drugs. We have other addicts (recovering) in our family; some may not agree, but I definitely see some hereditary tendencies towards addictive behavior. What's always been hard for me to understand about addiction is the question Oprah featured on her show yesterday (fate? coincidence?) which was "Why can't they stop?" Sometimes I have been insensitive enough to wonder that very same thing? Why couldn't Greg just stop using heroin? Why couldn't he find different people to hang out with, people who weren't themselves using drugs? Couldn't he see how much he had going for him? Didn't he appreciate those sacrifices his family made to get him help? Didn't he want to change? All these questions can be answered by saying of COURSE Greg wanted a different life. Of COURSE he appreciated his family and all their heroics (LITERAL HEROICS!). What the doctor on Oprah (and you all know how I feel about O...) was saying that finally made me understand why addicts continue abusing, even after intense rehab experiences, is that their brains have been hijacked. I'm going to paste some stuff from the website of yesterday's show - I'll come back at the end for some more from me.


********** from www.oprah.com ****************

For anyone who has struggled with addiction or loved an addict, the number one question most people want answered is, Why can't they stop?

Dr. Anna Rose Childress, a professor who specializes in brain behavior at the Pennsylvania VA Addiction Treatment Research Center, has been using the latest scientific technology to study addicts' brains and determine what happens when a person is struggling with substance abuse.

To see what's going on inside the brain, Dr. Childress takes pictures of an addict's brain reacting to images both related and unrelated to drug use. Then, the researchers compare the way the brain reacts to each cue to determine the areas that are affected.

Since the study began, Dr. Childress has worked with cocaine, marijuana, nicotine and heroin addicts. The substances may vary, but the results do not. Dr. Childress says that in most cases, the brain was "compromised."

"The person [who is addicted] is actually not making choices in the rational way," she says. "This brain is a different brain, and we think the brain may be different when you walk into the world in terms of your ability to manage some of your impulses. But certainly after it's been exposed to drugs, there are important changes."

The brain functions that are affected are the same ones that help us maintain relationships and seek out the things we need to survive, like food and sleep. "That kind of strong, strong desire is a part of this system in the brain that now gets upturned," Dr. Childress says. "It gets inverted. It gets hijacked, essentially. So the drug does have a direct impact on the brain."

William is one of the addicts who participated in Dr. Childress's study. While examining William's brain, she flashed cocaine cues—images of people he had used the drug with or things that reminded him of cocaine—onto a screen for just 33 milliseconds at a time. Most people wouldn't even be able to recognize what they were seeing, but William's brain was well aware.

"For someone with a history of cocaine, there's an intense arousal that sets up in milliseconds," Dr. Childress says. "These cues say, 'This is more important than your children, than your spouse, than your job…pursue this.' From the brain's perspective, this is the important thing."

Photos of William's brain show that there was a surge of chemicals released when he saw the powerful cues, which Dr. Childress calls the "go state." For the first time in human history, researchers can now see what's happening inside the brain, identify the targets and see what they need to address.

"We're really excited that we can both calm down the go state, but also bolster the brakes," she says. "One of the things that we've been able to see is that people with addictions—their brakes aren't so good. So [there are] two ways that you can help the car—one is to take your foot off the accelerator. Another way is to put on the brakes."

Dr. Childress's goal is to treat addiction with medications that curb the craving. "Instead of it being so compelling and something that would cause you to go away from your family and your children, with medication, you can get a brain now that's sort of back down to, 'This is not so exciting. I can take this or leave this,'" she says.

It may be years before experimental treatments and prescription medications are available to all mothers, fathers and friends struggling with an addiction. For now, Dr. Michael Dennis, a psychologist who specializes in teen addiction at the Lighthouse Institute in Bloomington, Illinois, says the sooner you intervene, the better.

Although there isn't one answer or solution for every addict, Dr. Dennis says 90 percent of the people who become dependent on a drug started using when they were under 18. Fifty percent of addicts began using drugs when they were 15 years old…or younger.

If someone you love suffers a relapse, Dr. Dennis says his or her chances of recovery increase the sooner you reintervene.

Even if someone has completed a rehabilitation program, triggers in the outside world can cause a relapse. "Rehab is just a tool," Rick says. "The doors open up and you walk out. If you're just holding a tool, and no one's out there to help you support it, you're going to fall right off the wagon."


************ me again **************

Isn't that powerful information? Only the first few times a person uses drugs is it a simple yes or no choice. After they are addicted, their brain wiring changes so that the pull is simply too strong. That doesn't mean that addicts aren't responsible, or should be allowed to go their own way because "it's out of their control"... it simply means that families and friends now can understand that these people really do care about their loved ones and responsibilities. Of course addicts respond to attempts at help in different ways. From what I know, Greg was relieved to be getting help - he really did not want to live as an addict. But when he came home, even though his body was clean, and his intentions positive, his brain was still not the same. And I feel awful for my assumptions about him and other addicts... and a bit hypocritical. "Why can't I just stop" eating jelly beans?

I encourage you to go here and read the rest of the information the doctors were talking about on the show. I hope that if someday your life is changed by an experience with addiction - either your own or that of someone you love - that everyone comes together with the love and support that our family did during Greg's last year. My aunt and uncle and cousin are SUPERHEROES. They loved their boy FIERCELY and did EVERYTHING in their power to save his life. And we all grieve with them still.

Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted. Matthew 5:4
But now Lord, what do I look for? My hope is in you. Psalm 39:7
My comfort in my suffering is this: your promise preserves my life. Psalm 119:50
Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for yet I will praise him, my Savior and my God. Psalm 43:5

Monday, April 09, 2007

one year

This is Greg. We miss him.






We really miss him.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

cousins

I rediscovered this not-so-old picture today. This was one of the saddest days ever, but it's also one of my favorite pictures. My cousins and siblings and I don't often get all together. In fact, you see Derek (a husband of one of the girls up top) holding the name of our cousin Adam since he wasn't able to stay. And also the lovely Aggy holding a photo of our Greg. This was the day of his funeral. We're smiling cause we were spending time before and after laughing about funny things Greg did, and goofy pictures of us as awkward teenagers, which was a healing balm on our hearts. This day, it was important to us to capture a moment when we all came together as family, whatever the reason.



We're almost in age order here in the picture. From the top, left to right: Adam (Derek), Jay, Sara, Holly, Peter, Katherine, Anna, Maresi, Amy, Carmine, JP, Greg (Aggy), Michael, and Ben in front. Good people all.

Thursday, June 22, 2006

one more angel

Someday soon I hope I'll have something to write about that doesn't involve someone else in our lives entering Heaven's eternal glory. Today, however, I have to share with you that our beloved Maxwell, Timon's grandfather, passed away yesterday afternoon. He was the best man at our wedding and who we named our son Henry for. It was sudden and sad, to say the least. I will try my best to post some pictures of Herb and Maxwell here soon. If you pray, and I hope you do, send one up for these two men who we loved so much. As Pastor Craig said Tuesday at Herb's service, they've gotten an upgrade on the people they are hanging out with. Instead of us riff-raff here on earth, now Maxwell and Herb are partying with Jesus, Paul, Johnny Cash, and the other greats who've gone before. Lucky them.

Monday, June 19, 2006

herb

Our friend Herb died on Friday night. He was a good man. This is one of those times when I wish so much that I could just call up Chad, since he was also close with Herb. But alas, he is on the trail and can neither know about it nor get here for the service tomorrow. Herb's in heaven, but we are sad here.

Friday, April 14, 2006

our greg


This is my cousin Gregory. He passed away just 6 days ago. I don't know what else to say except to share what I said at his memorial service on Wednesday.

"We all know that a picture is worth at least 1000 words. During the past few days, we’ve looked at many, many pictures of Gregory with his family and friends. Some of these photos can be seen on the photo boards today. They speak millions of words and tell wonderful stories about our Gregory and his loving family.

We see Gregory as an infant, already curious about his world. We see him standing between his parents taking some first steps. We see him camping with his mom, dad, and sister Amy as an energetic toddler, clothes so dirty with fun that it took three days to clean them. We see photos of him proudly holding his catch after fishing with his dad and grandfather. We see his face, hands, and sleeves covered with his mom’s spaghetti sauce. We see him throwing his head back with laughter, so full of the joy he couldn’t contain. We see him countless times with loving family members whose own joy was increased by his exuberance. We see him enjoying the outdoors, the natural world God created. We see him so often with Amy, the sister and brother so obviously displaying their love for one another, and a few times with a bit of youthful sibling mischief. We see him as a young man preparing for an Outward Bound adventure by allowing his grandmother Dorothy to give him a pedicure.

In his high school yearbook, his parents wrote: 'You didn’t walk, you ran. You didn’t cry, you screamed. You didn’t smile, you laughed. From the day you were born, your indomitable spirit and sense of adventure have been a source of inspiration and joy to us. Your heart is kind, your humor high, and we are proud of the young man you have become. Think big… dream dreams… work heard and carry our love and support with you always. Love, Dad, Mom, & Amy.'

We see the infant, the toddler, the boy, and the young man and know that all of this is true.


I’m going to share a couple of memories of Gregory, and then we’d like to extend the opportunity to any of you who also would like to speak about our Gregory.

I remember the day Gregory was born. I was six years old and at a friend’s house. Mom called me and said, 'You have a new baby cousin, and his name is Gregory.' Now, I am certain that his birth was God’s comforting hand, bringing some measure of joy to an otherwise very difficult time, so close to our grandfather Carmine’s passing. Gregory was a student of life. I don’t know many other little boys who will crash matchbox cars one minute, go play outside, come in filthy dirty, take a bath… and then, put on their footy pajamas and come downstairs and ask their babysitting older cousin if we could please watch The Sound of Music. I thank God for his presence in our world. "

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

pretty

yesterday henry and i went to t.i. beach and it was so pretty. sometimes i can't believe i live here. perfect sunshine, blue skies, a little breeze, palm trees, white sand and roaring (well, purring) surf. i have to say, though - these two months are reward for the rest of the hellishly hot year. we've earned it, I say. speaking of pretty, a very beautiful woman passed away early this morning. mamie was another grandma to me and she was amazing. if you pray, and i hope you do, send one up for mamie, her husband irving who we call grandfather, her children and grandchildren.

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

i see dead people

Hope none of you reading are creeped out by what I'm about to write.

It took me almost 28 years to see my first dead body. I've not been to too many funerals, but the ones I have been to have been memorials, where the body's been cremated or already buried. Since September, I've been to 4 funerals and every single one has had a viewing beforehand. I'm still not used to or comfortable with it. I know the person's Spirit is elsewhere, but it's kind of gross to look at their body. The wonderful man we honored today here at the church has a GIGANTIC spirit, but he looked so small lying there. So it's not really him, is it? So why do we have to look at them? Hope that's not insensitive to think that way.
well, that's all for now.