book 3 (ok, and 4, too)

Ok, I know.  It’s the 11th of January and I’ve already read 3 (ok, 4) books.  How does a busy wife and mother of two who works full-time outside the home do such a thing?  Well, you should know that I read exceptionally fast, and that I read for a couple of hours each night, typically.  For reference, I read each of the last three Harry Potter books (896, 652, and 784 pages) in one full day (about 11 hours), given that I literally relinquished all duties, parenting and otherwise, for the day.  (Thanks again, Timon!) 

ANYWAY.  I finished Let The Great World Spin, by Colum McCann.  I LOVED this book.  It’s one of those novels that intertwines a bunch of different stories – at first it’s difficult to see how they are connected but in the end it all comes together.  The main connection revolves around the (totally real) story of Phillippe Petit’s 1974 high-wire walk between the Twin Towers.  This book is really, really, good.  (Side-note and additional recommendation: See the documentary about Petit called Man On Wire.  We enjoyed it a lot.  You won’t believe what this dude did to make it across that distance 1000 feet in the air.  The movie is like a love letter to the towers, and when the kids are old enough I can’t wait to show it to them to better understand why they were chosen as targets on 9/11.)

I also finished A Friend Of The Family, by Lauren Grodstein.  This book was very highly recommended by a cousin of mine (she’s a publisher and editor, so she reads A LOT, probably more than me).  I wasn’t blown away by it – the story was interesting and it had a good premise.  A father of an only child wants to protect his son and attempts to do so at all costs, and he ends up paying for his impulses.  My problem with the book was that it was at nearly the very very end that the point was made, and I felt like I was strung along a little, like it was stretched out unnecessarily.  One thing that may have affected this for me was that it was REALLY late last night and I had about 30 pages left, and I was rushing through to the end so I wouldn’t have to wait until tonight to finish it.  Maybe one day I’ll read it a bit with a bit more leisure and I’ll enjoy it more.

Still not a whole lot going on here – Henry got his first yellow (!) today at school and that was quite a shock to all of us.  He entered the house in tears, fearful of my reaction.  We thankfully all stayed calm and he’s restricted from TV and video games until the weekend.  Maria was NOT pleased when I sent her to bed tonight, and could be heard grumbling about how dreadfully she’s been treated (“Mommy NOT NICE”) – for about 2 minutes before passing out for the night.  Adorable.

Tonight I’ve been writing this post, watching L&O: SVU, listening to Timon snore on the couch, and resolving to NOT begin any new books until Thursday.  Nighty-night.

xviii

This is one of those afternoons when the thought of adding any more children into this home makes me want to crawl into my bed and put my head under the pillow.  And so I have Henry at the table with his homework and Maria in her room with a book, (neither of these things was achieved without much wailing and gnashing of teeth) and here I sit to post.  Before I began, I decided it was time to listen to Peter, Paul, & Mary’s A Holiday Celebration album.  And then that makes me wish my sister was here to sing along, loudly, and in harmony.  Henry may have gotten a green day at school, but he surely has earned at least a yellow here at home this afternoon.  I probably have earned a red.  When is the principal coming to take me out of this class?  :)

xvii

Well, it came to pass.  Henry got an orange today and was sobbing as he told me about it.  Of course I don’t want to see him sad, but it’s good that the consequence of not being able to attend movie night at church on Friday seems to be a meaningful one.  We had a good talk last night about choosing behavior, one that Timon and I hoped would stick with him today.  I also sent him off to school with some encouraging words.  He told me a little bit ago that he tried to not talk so much today.  I thanked him for being aware of himself and let him know that I was sorry that he would miss movie night because he was looking forward to it.  Poor kid.  Learning self-control is a long battle.  I know I’m still figuring it out!

xvi

Henry seems to be following suit as one of a long line of mischief makers and talkative distractible students (traits inherited from BOTH parents, I’m afraid).  Each day his teachers report on his classroom behavior by assigning a color according to how well he did.  Options are green (no problems), orange (had to be spoken to more than once about some kind of undesirable behavior), yellow (presumably the student has been very disruptive), or red (the principal had to remove the student from the class).  Henry seems to be getting orange at least once or twice a week these days.  Are we being unreasonable for assigning consequences at home that increase as he gets more orange days?  For example, yesterday he had orange and we did not give him an additional consequence, but today he received orange again (described in his agenda book as being given because he did not stay on task in class – this doesn’t surprise me in the slightest) and we decided to not allow him to ride his bike for a week.  (He recently learned to ride without training wheels and has really been enjoying riding.)  If he gets orange again this week he won’t be allowed to go to movie night at church, something he’s really looking forward to. 

I don’t think we’re being unreasonable at all, but truly, I have zero clue if it’s making any difference.  And I’m definitely not a fan of imposing consequences that don’t work, or of having punishments in effect all the darn time.  I know a family who speak to their children with what I call “high-alert” voices all the time, meaning that they instruct the children to pick up their books with the same sharp, loud, commanding voices that I feel should be reserved for use only when a child is in real serious danger (like they’re about to step in front of a speeding car).  The result of this is that the kids don’t listen to anything, since they’re accustomed to tuning any and all instructions out, with the knowledge that no threats will be followed through with and any consequences will be random and not meaningful.  So I worry about having consequences for the little things and not saving them for the big ones.  What would you do about the orange days? 

1st day of 1st grade

Henry and Maria enjoyed a breakfast of cereal this morning, after Henry rejected my offer of pancakes.  WHO IS THIS CHILD?

Then Henry posed for the obligatory front-of-the-door-first-day-of-school photo (this is the goofy version, at his request):

And then I had to placate Maria by taking her photo through the window.  Before I know it they’ll both be out in front of the door.  Ay yi yi.

 

1st day reports, though scarce (seriously, he’s clamming up about school ALREADY?  I thought I had a few more years before that started.) seem positive and upbeat.  He came home with a green spot in his agenda (the date book they give all students to help keep track of things), which means he didn’t mouth off straight away.  Who could ask for more?